earful of craptonite

I was listening to the Cubs/Astros game on the radio yesterday and I heard Pat Hughes say that the next guy up was Matt Suhey. I’m like, that’s crazy, Matt Suhey was the fullback for the greatest sports team of all time, the 1985-86 Chicago Bears.

It wasn’t until I was watching today’s game that I realized they were talking about Kaz Matsui. And it’s not like I don’t know that Kaz Matsui exists. I specifically remember an exchange from Monday’s game about how Matsui and Fukudome went to high school together.

This is not the first time I’ve heard something stupid like that. When I was much much younger, I would listen to sports reports on the radio and I would notice that Yukon was a very good basketball program. I don’t know how long it took me to realize that they were talking about Connecticut, aka UConn. And again, I knew that UConn was a basketball powerhouse, but there I was, thinking that a bunch of eskimos in the outlands of Canada were this unlikely college-hoops dynamo. I just couldn’t make the connection between the UConn I knew on paper and what I heard.

I’m going to posit that this is all because English is not my first language. More likely, I’m just a tard.

Am I alone here? Please tell me this happens to other people.


7 Responses to “earful of craptonite”

  1. Shan Says:

    It reminds me of people who screw up common sayings. Like I knew a guy who would say, “Right off the back” instead of “Right off the bat.” Then there’s the standard “nip it in the butt” vs. “nip it in the bud.”
    All intensive purposes.
    The list goes on.
    You’re all tards.

  2. Damsel in Digress Says:

    I think they prefer to be called inuits.

  3. Damsel in Digress Says:

    I used to think the Salem witch trials happened in Salem, Oregon. Even though I knew that in the 1600s, the only part of the US that was inhabited by the evil Puritans was the New England region. So, just like you pictured basketball playing Eskimos in Canada, I pictured little witches being burned along the Pacific Ocean, and nothing but wild trees and Big Foot to see.

  4. Pete Says:

    They may prefer to be called inuits, but I’m having nunavut.

  5. Kaitlyn Says:

    This is a partial note to Shannon’s note…do you remember in Ms. Kochan’s class Amanda Martin’s confuzzlement over the term “way to go”? Instead, she always wrote “wait to go” on everyone’s essays. I defer to the c.lit major, but can entire phrases, and not just words, be homophones??

  6. Teri M. Says:

    I’ll contribute “cease to exist”. As opposed to “cease and desist”.

    And I know the quotes are supposed to go to the right of the punctuation but it annoys me and I refuse to do it.

  7. Marlene Says:

    Somehow i missed the point. Probably lost in translation 🙂 Anyway … nice blog to visit.

    cheers, Marlene!!!

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